Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Getting Personal About Dating..

I was fully prepared to post a new outfit today and as I was waiting for the photo's to download I got distracted per usual and came across an old post here on Stuff She Likes from 2010.  Yep.. that's right,  5 years ago I wrote a very personal post about the state of dating and it just so happens that although it is 5 years later.. I find myself in the same position (dating wise).  So I thought I would do something I have never done here on the blog.. and that's re-post myself and actually try out my own advice.. again!

Would love to hear what you guys think!

 (Below is an excerpt from my 2010 post on the state of dating)

"I was editing and I got to thinking..  (Shocker I know...)

Anyhow I was thinking about how we as the young generation (some of us a bit younger than others) communicate these days..

text.., IM, [Instagram, Twitter] etc...

It's all so impersonal.

A while back I asked someone I was dating to send me their address.  He was absolutely stunned.  I  wanted to write him a letter and for the life of him he could not comprehend that.  Needless to say I never got the address.  What was it about about my scribbled handwriting on a piece of paper that frightened him so much??

Like I said, it's all so impersonal.  I meet people on a daily basis and I am coming to realize that there is really no such thing as a first conversation anymore.

We meet.  We briefly talk, usually about very superficial things (as it should be within the first minutes of meeting someone) and then the "keyboard" relationship begins.  We exchange one of the five communication tools listed above and the next five conversations are all to be had with our keyboards.  You actually don't even hear the persons voice again unless a date commences.  

I don't know about you but for me that just makes the first date seem that much more awkward.  You have absolutely no sense of the person you are now sitting across from because not only do you not know their voice but through the "keyboard conversation" there has inevitably been some type of miss communication that neither party wants to admit to.

And believe me I am just as guilty as the next person...

Thus I have decided to start a little one woman "keyboard conversation" revolution.  As hard as this may be from here on out I refuse to facebook or google someone when I first meet them.  Okay I guess that's not quite a revolution... more like a one woman revolt, but it is a start.  I am going to actually find the time to pick up the phone and dial the number given to me rather than text a one sentence message, and if that person finds me to be be it!

What I am saying is that I am making a vow to be more personal..more human.. a little more vintage..

I'll let you all know how it turns out..

Alright!! here goes nothing..."

What do you guys think?

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  1. T, years ago in revolting to text abuse, I refused to respond to texts after first meeting someone - hoping they would pick up the phone. If he really liked me, I suppose, he would, ugh, phone. As it happened, I picked up the phone one day and had a loooong conversation with a man (a set-up) that had me in hysterics. We both looked forward to our first date. Several years later we are a very happily married couple who texts each other rather than calling. He passed the test, so whatever. Looking someone up on Facebook can save a lot of bad first dates. I'd rather stay hone with a good book. XO, L

  2. Very good perspective, and I always like to start a connection in person and over time before jumping into anything romantic. Beautiful!


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